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Joke of the Day

"Kinky and Perverted What is the difference between perverted?? Kinky is when you tickle your lovers ass with a feather ... perverted is when you use the whole chicken!"

"Texting drivers running over texting pedestrians: a modern day zombie apocalypse."

"I once stole a simile I made out like a bandit"

"Why did the optimistic Chinese guy wish he had multiple personality disorder? He wanted to be the Changs he wanted to see in the world."

"A dyslexic agnostic stays awake at night wondering if there really is a dog."

"What's the best way to get a fat chick to have sex with you? Whoops, wrong subreddit"

"How does Hitler tie his shoes? In littles Nazis."

"If you were to wrap a cloud as a gift, what would you wrap it with? A RAINBOW!"

"So I was listening to some old-school French rap the other day I think the group was called the Oui-Tang Clan"

"This Heat is Like a Middle Eastern Dictator... This Heat is Like a Middle Eastern Dictator. It's oppressive, you can't get away from it, and I'm pretty sure we can blame the U.S. for it."