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Joke of the Day

"This Heat is Like a Middle Eastern Dictator... This Heat is Like a Middle Eastern Dictator. It's oppressive, you can't get away from it, and I'm pretty sure we can blame the U.S. for it."

"Q. What's the difference between a dead bagpiper in the road and a dead country singer in the road? A. The country singer may have been on the way to a recording session."

"You can make fun of the Amish all you want on the Internet They'll never see it!"

"It funny that when it's black on white, it's a crime. When it it's white on black, it's a hate crime."

"Why do black people have nightmares? The cops killed the ones that had a dream"

"You've heard about the Ferguson situation, right? The issues raised aren't exactly black or white."

"Do you know what a 6.9 is? A good thing screwed up by a period."

"if men fall asleep directly after sex . . . why is it so hard to catch a rapist? -Jimmy Carr p.s. never high five a rabbi"

"What do you call 256 Shades of Grey? Grayscale"

"John was at the 17th floor of a building. John hop off from the ledge and began to fall. Why didn't John die? John is a bird."