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Joke of the Day
"What did the cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? Wipe."
Next Joke
"I have to say to you something... something."
"You guys know that dude Jesus? Yeah, I heard he was a real thorn in the Romans' side"
"""OH MY GOD IS THAT GLUTEN ON THE FLOOR!?!?!"" Great way to clear the checkout lines at Whole Foods."
"Jury awards $22 million to man locked in closet by East Cleveland police for four days with no food or toilet. R Kelly is going to sue the East Cleveland police for copyright infringement."
"Date: Lets break the ice. Polar bear: break th-[shatters Coke bottle] BREAK THE ICE? What are you saying?! D: I mea- PB: THATS MY HOME LINDA"
"For a week I've been telling my kid ""If your cough isn't better tomorrow, you're going to the doctor!"" and it finally worked. (She died.)"
"Just told my four year old daughter there's a skeleton inside of her and made her cry."
"How do Mexicans cut their pizzas? Little Caesers"
"How long does it take for a White woman to take a crap? 9 Months."