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Joke of the Day
"What's the difference between my girlfriend and a cow? Cows are real."
Next Joke
"I'm opening a store that specializes in selling automatic weapons. It's called Bloodbath & Beyond"
"Ladies, I don't understand this childish obsession with unicorns. The horn isn't there for shits and giggles. They spear and kill shit."
"Why is ship tapered Why is shit tapered? So you're asshole doesn't slam shut. (I was watching my dog take a dump yesterday and this old joke came to mind)"
"I got a job installing security systems... I find it pretty alarming"
"Murder is like art, as long as you can bullshit your way into justifying it, someone out there will be like ""oh yeah, I totally get it."""
"An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar... The Englishman wanted to go so they all had to leave."
"What do you get when two giraffes collide? a giraffic jam!"
"Is is best to do your homework on an empty stomach or a full stomach? It's best to do it on paper."
"livin la vida broka"