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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between a porcupine and a police car. A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside."

"The first time a woman swallowed my stuff, I was so appreciative that I swallowed her bullshi t for the next two years."

"What do you call a pack of sorority girls who aren't in law school? Deez hoes ain't lawyers."

"An 8 year old just asked me why people in electric cars don't get electrocuted when it rains and now we're checking Google"

"What do you call a prosthetic used in exchage for your missing leg. A stubstitute"

"My shoulder just got to 2nd base with the chick who is cutting my hair..."

"Was just reading a new book with a great female hero And I can say I'm addicted to this heroine."

"I won't believe corporations are people Until Texas executes one."

"Did you know beer makes you smarter. As it made Bud Wieser."

"Apparently the first thing you should say after you back over your wife's foot is ""I'm sorry"" not ""I guess that means no sex tonight"""