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Joke of the Day

"Printer tired while printing her picture Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing."

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"What's the difference between England and Oscar Pistorius? England gets off scott-free."
"I'm worried about my boy... At breakfast this morning, when I handed him a box of Cheerios, he shouted, ""Omg, donut seeds!"""
"My teacher touched me Seriously, his lecture was fantastic"
"A horse walks into a bar... ""Why the long face?"" asks the bartender... The horse replies, ""I can no longer make ends meet based solely on the royalties from Sex in the City."""
"I went to a zoo the other day There was only one animal in the zoo a dog it was a shitzu"
"If I want to nap for just an hour, I have a big glass of water beforehand. Alarms can be turned off, but a full bladder waits for no one."
"3 logicians walk into a bar the bartender says ""do you all want beer?"" the first logician says ""I'm not sure"" the second logician says ""I'm not sure"" the third logician says ""Jul 16"""
"My wife doesn't like it when I pee in the shower... Especially when I'm not in it... And she is."
"I bet Hitler & the guy who invented the car alarm belong to a book club together in hell."