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Joke of the Day

"3 logicians walk into a bar the bartender says ""do you all want beer?"" the first logician says ""I'm not sure"" the second logician says ""I'm not sure"" the third logician says ""Jul 16"""

"hey joggers instead of those dumb little shorts you should wear batman costumes so I can feel like my neighborhood is protected"

"What did the letter O say to the letter Q? ""Hey, your dick is hanging out"""

"I don't need a calendar to tell me winter is approaching *strokes wife's leg hair*"

"It's not fair that women make 77 cents for every dollar a man makes... ...that only leaves 23 cents for the guy!"

"By the time you finish reading this tweet, you will be slightly closer to death than you were before. I hope it was worth it."

"What is the best thing about having sex with twenty-five year olds? There's twenty of them."

"Too many people are obsessing over Frozen. They need to let it go"

"It's dumb for me to spend money on porn or sex... ... that's a lot of money wasted on 3 and a half minutes."

"A woman flashed her tits at me today.... I just sat there and giggled like a school boy. Then she said to me "" will you stop mucking around and check this lump, doctor."""