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Joke of the Day

"Q: What do you get when you cross a crooked lawyer with a crooked politician? A: Chelsea."

"Sometimes I get down on my knees and pray for a pigeon to fly directly into my mouth"

"I'm an antisocial-psychic. I can see ahead of time that I won't want to talk to you."

"Why was the female bank teller angry? She was going through the change..."

"How do Jews fight? With JewJitsu"

"A midget goes to the doctor and exclaims ""doctor! doctor! can you treat me??"" Doctor says: ""yes, you just have to be a little patient."""

"Once you have to start paying a babysitter every time you go out, you realize most friendships aren't worth it."

"Q: Have you read the book about very cold temperatures? A: Not only does it have two covers, it has a jacket."

"I'm torn on what i really think about masturbation. on one hand it feels good."

"My friend found a Paras while we were playing Pokemon Go. So I asked him, ""Was it under a truck?"""