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Joke of the Day

"I was at the confessional booth the other day and I asked the priest if he thought it would be a good idea to stop masturbating He said ""Sure, If it bothers you, I'll stop""."

"Why did the crayon want to be a phone? Because it wanted to be a texta."

"NURSE: Doctor, I've lost the cat's pulse VET: Ok. Time of death is 10:05, 10:05, 10:05, 10:05, 10:05, 10:05, 10:05, 10:05, and 10:05"

"BLOND DOG Q: Why does a blond dog have lumps on his head? A: He's been chasing parked cars."

"They said I'd have to kiss a lot of frogs before finding my prince. I never found him, but I did find out I'm REALLY into frogs."

"When is a shirt not a shirt? When it's attire."

"One thing that Sean Connery asked his wife only once and never again. To sit on his face."

"There's so much sexism in this world. Just once I'd like to see a Maury show titled ""You are not the Mother""."

"vote for me if ew like it watsup boring.facebook fucking.viber irritating.tango disgusting.skype ignoring. google porn'in ....lyf is complicated."

"Don't Commit Suicide 0/10 people who commit suicide recommend it."