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Joke of the Day

"HR and I apparently disagree on what ""debriefed"" means."

"What is the black stuff between elephants' toes? Slow natives"

"[first date] HIM: Can I call you sometime? HER: [slowly slides napkin over phone] You can't... I lost my phone"

"ah excellent, an update to this software i use. think i'll select remind me in 4 hours twice a day for the next seven months"

"Why are programmers bad at doing laundry? They throw all their dirty clothes on the heap."

"What did the train say on the way to Auschwitz? Jew-Jew"

"I'm an okay dancer until I whip out the finger guns, then I'm just majestic."

"A NoSQL query walks into a bar.. ...and then walks out because there were no tables."

"I faked a cough to get out of work. I tell myself I wasn't lying... I was just being SARScastic."

"My ex's taught me that not every I love you is real."