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Joke of the Day

"Ordering a cake over the phone ""And what would you like the cake to say?"" [covers phone to ask wife] ""Honey, do we want a talking cake?"""

"There are three fourth graders, a white boy, a black boy, and an asian boy. Who have the biggest dick? The black kid. Cause he's 21. People here get butthurt by the simplest jokes. Good lord."

"Only assholes shit in urinals"

"It's an emergency! I need underwear jokes. My baby sister needs underwear jokes for some mysterious reason. I need your guys help!"

"little caesars makes an ok pizza but just think what they could do if their caesar was full size"

"If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?"

"What's the difference between jam and marmalade? I can't marmalade my cock in someones ass."

"I always keep a hammer in my pocket in case someone asks me to help them fix something so I can immediately break my leg."

"Don't get it. Heard the phrase ""keep your friends clothes & keep your enemies clothes, sir"". Now I have a bunch of naked people angry at me."

"Dem puns... Why are there two hundred and thirty-nine beans in Irish Bean Soup? Because if there be one moar, it'd be too farty!"