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Joke of the Day
"""Internet pretty"" angled profile photos that disguise the ugly truth."
Next Joke
"Why should you always carry a knife around? Because sharp wits won't always give you the edge."
"A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog. It's a shitzu."
"Girls be having unprotected sex but then have the best case for their iPhone. They care more about their phone than their pussy"
"On Thanksgiving, in Soviet Russia... Turkey shoot you!"
"Why did Napoleon's soldiers wear red buttons on their blue jackets during the battle of Waterloo? ... so that they could close their jackets."
"""Want to get a drink?"" ""Later:"" ""How about now?"" ""Later."" ""Now?"" ""Later."" ""Now?"" --If the Windows Auto Updates pop up was your friend."
"A prostitute said she would do anything for $10... Guess who just got their car washed!"
"Bill Cosby likes his women like he doesn't like his computer Not responding."
"Even on my death bed my wife will be telling me how she had a worse day than me."