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Joke of the Day

"A man purchases a kitten, which he's having trouble house breaking. What does his friend say when he comes to visit? Your house is quite the cat-ass-trophy."

"I recently asked a serial-killer/serial-rapist/psychopath what she's doing. She replied, ""Good."""

"One way to find out if you're old is to fall down in front of a group of people. If they laugh, you're young, if they panic, you're old."

""" National No Bra Day""? I say pics or it didn't happen day."

"The difference between Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee? Why does Chuck Norris have a lot of jokes but Bruce Lee doesn't? Because Bruce Lee is no joke..."

"Scientists say you're more likely to die of what your grandparents died of rather than your parents If anyone sees any German snipers let me know"

"Why do blondes have more fun? They're easier to find in the dark."

"How does Yoda spend his time. He mostly just sits on his log, watching the Dagobah."

"Every time Larry picked up his colleagues in NJ and drove them to NYC, his wrists started hurting. He was diagnosed with carpool tunnel syndrome."

"What would you call your geologist friend if you are a pokemon fan? Geodude"