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Joke of the Day
"Bought a new vacuum cleaner.. ..it sucks more than my old one"
Next Joke
"There's a nun at my church who occasionally does stuff involving leather. And I'm okay with that, I really am. Just so long as she doesn't make a habit out of it."
"For this Valentines day, I'll be inundated. Oops. I mean I'll be in, undated."
"Enemas make shit happen. No seriously."
"What happens when the fog lifts in California? UCLA."
"Who called them accountants and not sumbodies?"
"What comes out of a reasonable volcano? Pragma."
"My Ex-Wife still misses me BUT HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER!"
"Honey I Shrunk the Kids And I Shrunk Some Water Skis And Now This Little Squirrel Is Skiing In Our Pool And Its Rad You Gotta See This Babe"
"Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because he only comes once a year and it's down a chimney! Merry Christmas sickos! :)"