62852

Joke of the Day

"Your place or mine? Tell you what? I'll flip a coin. Head at my place, tail at yours."

"I like my women with curves. Those skinny ones are alway mad cause they're hungry."

"The only people who received awards for African American Achievement at my brother's 5th grade graduation were black. Fucking racism."

"4-year-old: Can you hold my rubber ducky? Me: *takes the ducky* Why? 4: I dropped it in the toilet."

"Why does Kylo Ren have no friends? Because his whole life he's Ben Solo"

"There was a praying mantis in my room so I stealthily grabbed a shoe and smashed my 2nd-story window and jumped out."

"Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems."

"I've ended up encountering much less porridge than I had expected I would as a child."

"One of my last days in town and my girlfriend asks me what I want to do, and I say we could just sit around. She says what will we sit around?"

"What is Buddhism measured in? Oooohms"