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Joke of the Day

"Three blondes walk into a bar You would have thought that one of them would see it."

"Dr: Your Mom is like regular moms except we lost her in surgery. Me: Did you just use a joke format to tell me my mom died Dr: yep"

"One-liners for when you're leaving - example: ""I'm going to make like a baby, and head out."" I also use ""Let's make like a chapped-ass, and split."" What are some other good ones?"

"My daughter is the perfect height for using an umbrella to simultaneously keep her dry and for me to lose an eye from one of its corners"

"Math is a drama queen. It can't seriously have that many problems."

"SiriusXM is broadcasting NASCAR because there's nothing more exciting than listening to people drive."

"How small you are in the universe In class there is a sub in class and is talking about how small I am in the universe and I reply ""teacher I'm small in the universe but I know were I'm big"""

"Clones. Clones are people two."

"I just passed a beer truck on the highway. ""Wait a minute. I'm named after beer?!!?"" -My 6 yr old son, Miller"

"Why did truffle get invited to the party? Cos he was a fun-guy"