62009

Joke of the Day

"Energizer bunny arrested. Charged with battery. LOL just kidding it was double homicide."

"*Librarian walks in* You know what's great kids? You don't need wifi to read a book! *Kids boo* *Someone in the crowd yells ""NERD""*"

"I saw an Asian man jerking off in a starbucks Called him a Fappenchino."

"Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms...."

"Watch My lesbian friend gave me a Timex for my birthday. I don't think she understood me correctly when I said I wanna watch."

"There's a nun at my church who occasionally does stuff involving leather. And I'm okay with that, I really am. Just so long as she doesn't make a habit out of it."

"*leaves the kids w/ a new babysitter *calls to check on the sitter"

"I just saved a girl from rape. I stopped chasing her."

"Uh oh, happy facebook newlywed, your husband just created a twitter account."

"What did tie say to the hat? You go on ahead, I'll hang around."