61567

Joke of the Day

"What do you call cake that isn't yours? Stollen"

"Did you hear about the guy who went to the convention of legless women? He heard the place was crawling with pussy."

"No, your baby was definitely crying before I dropped it, that's why I dropped it."

"Finally found a house! We couldn't afford it and it wasn't for sale, but we just murdered the owners and took it anyway. Happy Columbus Day!"

"What is a 6.9 ? A good thing ruined by a period."

"what do a roadway, for coworkers in the same car, that goes underwater and discomfort in the wrist from excessive computer use have in common? carpool tunnel"

"My girlfriend is like the square root of -1 Imaginary"

"Don't mess around with asexuals They don't fuck around."

"Happy and Sad An old man says to his wife, ""Honey, there is no possible way to feel both happiness and sadness at the same time."" The wife says, ""Out of all your brothers, you have the biggest dick."""

"What do you call... What do you call a deer with no eyes? -No idea What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? -Still no idea"