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Joke of the Day

"""Babe, is it in?"" *""Yea.""* **""Does it hurt?""** *""Uh huh.""* **""Let me put it in slowly.""** *""It still hurts.""* **""Okay, let's try another shoe size.""**"

"My cell-mate had nick name for me... Mitochondria."

"Where do you find a man with an aquatic mammal fetish? In Wales."

"Why does Trump like French music? Because he likes to grab them by Debussy."

"Lets play army Want to play army? I can lay down and you can blow the hell out of me."

"Why do midgets laugh when they play soccer? 'Cause the grass tickles their balls when they run"

"Did you hear about the Zodiac killer? I heard he cut his victims in to little pisces!"

"David Cameron walks into a sandwich shop with a pig... The shopkeeper says ""alright dave, pulled pork ?"" ""No mate, she's just a friend."""

"Broke Last night, a burglar broke into my flat looking for some money. I woke up and went with him to join him in the search."

"Fitness guru just tweeted ""remember to breathe"" and it was pure luck that I got the message in time."