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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the Aggie that moved to Oklahoma? Raised the I.Q. of both states."

"what do you call the smallest joke database in the world? r/jokes"

"If God doesn't believe in himself... Does that make him an atheist or does he just have low self-esteem?"

"son I heard u praying for grandma. look that's nice *clears throat* but daddy's tweets need prayers too. im in a RT dry spell right now, son"

"Why was Twelve running from Seven? Because Seven had a fucking rocket launcher!"

"They tried me make to go to rehab and I said what is rehab hombre I speak Spanish *huffs a lot paint*"

"A crowd started gathering around the car accident with the bagpiper... Twas so unfortunate he was kilt."

"I have failed math eleventeen times or so."

"Just found out Fox News's website has a Science section, which I assume links to a video of Sean Hannity screaming at a biology textbook."

"I was shocked to find out that the woman I love was a one-night-stand type of girl. So I went to the furniture store and got her another one."