60528

Joke of the Day

"My wife said she for Lent she was giving up eating meat. I thought she did that after the wedding vows."

"What do you guys think of message boards? ....I'm all forum."

"Jewish kid asks his Grandpa for money Grandson: Hey Grandpa, can I have 30 dollars? Jewish Grandpa: 20 dollars?? What do you need 10 dollars for?!"

"*licks ice cream cone Cone: I have a boyfriend."

"Did you get those pants on sale? Guy: Hey girl did you get those pants on sale? Girl: No why. Do they look bad? Guy: No cause they'd be 100% off at my place."

"If you're ever get attacked by a group of white people, just yell ""EVERYBODY CLAP YOUR HANDS!"" and they'll all stop to do the Cha Cha Slide."

"*walks into confessional, closes door and sits down* Me: Alright. Look alive over there, Father, I've had a pretty wild week..."

"I've been reading a lot about how to live and eat healthier and then not doing anything with that information."

"I've got a ""bun"" (baby) in the ""oven"" (oven)!"

"I'm pretty sure the rule at Starbucks is the slowest employee makes the drinks"