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Joke of the Day

"The problem with politics today... Republicans treat people like dogs and Democrats treat dogs like people"

"i don't know why people think women are weak... well hell pots and pans are heavy"

"I told my girlfriend that she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised."

"What did the snake say when offered a piece of cheese ? Thanks I'll just have a sliver !"

"Old Aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, ""You're next."" They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals."

"Polish remover Hitler. The game Sequence has a wicked sense of humor."

"Whenever I talk to a Mexican I feel like there's some kind of barrier between us It's about 4 ft high, made of wood and there's usually a cash register on top of it."

"If I'm ever reincarnated I hope I get to be a bear because I'll be like ""stop playing dead, I used to be human. That shits not gonna work!"""

"It's ok to leave a client with split ends if you're a hairdresser. But not if you're a mohel!"

"Tom should concentrate less on Myspace and more on his shoe business"