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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a Southern Zoo and a Northern Zoo? A Southern Zoo has a description of the animal on the cage along with a recipe."

"What the hell is Minecraft? Hitler's lesser known, second, book about his love of knitting."

"Water bears are so badass... if they fall into the pits at La Brea, the tar degrades."

"What do you call a fruit that stays up very late to study for tests? A cramberry."

"Adding a smiley face after anything makes things seem playful. Examples: You're a slut:) You're ugly:) I killed your puppy:)"

"An Irishman, An Englishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender says ""Is this some kind of joke?"""

"Why did the clam get in an accident? He was talking on his shellphone."

"What do you call a Mexican Jedi? A Padajuan"

"""Wanna hear a chemistry joke?"" ""Na, man, I'm good."" ""Wow, you didn't have to get salty over it."" (Chemically inaccurate but who cares, right?)"

"9: Why are you hitting that spider? wife: I don't like spiders me: Ooooh *grabs newspaper* mother-in-law [leaving] I don't have to take this"