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Joke of the Day

"Are rape jokes funny in this subreddit? I wouldn't want to do anything if you guys said NO."

"Why do dogs hate outer space? Because they strongly dislike vacuums."

"I'm such a hipster... I'm such a hipster that I won't listen to the Beatles until they're all dead. That way I can say I was a fan when they were underground."

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder my ass. I haven't been on Myspace in years and I still think it fucking sucks."

"You would think that, if you pulled a snail's shell off, then it would be able to move faster. I tried it, but they seem to be more sluggish."

"What couldn't the cross-eyed teacher do?.... Control their pupils"

"I threw a boomerang 6 years ago and it never came back... Now I live in constant fear."

"Why did the Mexican push his wife off the cliff? Tequila"

"The mall Im a New Yorker, and I hate malls. I like to compare them to hell. The average mall has seven levels, the people their want you to go to the mall, and everyone there is republican"

"What tick likes to run? Politicks"