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Joke of the Day

"How do you know your S&M partner works in IT? They insist your safe word has an upper case letter, a lower case letter, and at least one number."

"Why can't Harry Potter tell the difference between his cooking pot and his best friend? Because they're both cauldron"

"Well they were right. If you shave around it it looks bigger Damn nose.."

"A man comes home from work one night to catch his blonde girlfriend sliding down the banister naked. He blurts out ""What do you think you're doing?"" ""Just heating up dinner"" she replies."

"Got suspended from Instagram for going on everyone's food pics and posting the calories."

"Playing guitar is a sin... ...after all, Jesus told his disciples to ""fret not."""

"What's the difference between an Electrician and someone who's high? The electrician knows where the ground is."

"What do you say to Simba when he's slow? Mufasa! ""move faster"" heu heu heu"

"Why did Hitler kill himself? He finally got the gas bill."

"What is the biggest danger to an ear f*cker? Hearing AIDS."