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Joke of the Day

"How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb? THE LIGHTBULB IS FINE. THERE IS NO PROBLEM WITH IT. I MADE LIGHTBULBS WITH GOOD MANAGEMENT. LET'S MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN."

"Why does the alphabet like to piss on the periodic table? Because it's elemental pee!"

"If I ever find out that my wife is going to be an octo-mom... I'm octa-gone."

"What came first the chicken or the egg? The rooster."

"Wife: [looking at bank statement] what's this huge charge from Clones R Us? Me: [sends group text to 7 other me's] she's on to us"

"Why doesnt Santa Clause have any kids? Because he only comes once a year and its only ever down a chimney"

"Riverdance was invented by an Irish family with 7kids but only one toilet."

"Who Makes More Money, A Prostitute Or A Drug Dealer? A prostitute. Because a prostitute can always wash her crack and resell it."

"Why did the hipster drown? Because he went ice-skating before it was cool ( )"

"What do you get if you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo"