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Joke of the Day

"Malaysia airlines are having a huge sale Flights to any destination in the world for $499 one way.... return flights not available"

"Like most pale people I will be occupying the indoors this summer."

"(Business) Mike: It's a sled. I call it the Mikesled. Bob: I have a better idea."

"If there's more than one apocalypse, is it apocalypses or apocali? I just want to be ready."

"Whats the difference between Facebook and Reddit? About two hours."

"What do you call a Texan who just had sex? A jolly rancher. Credit goes to my friend at school."

"You can't bait me. I'm the masturbator."

"Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: There have been sightings of UFOs."

"i hate that one occasional cadbury cream egg you get that has a bloody malformed cadbury bunny fetus inside"

"One Mississippi... two Mississippi... just kidding! One Mississippi is quite enough."