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Joke of the Day
"Whats the difference between Facebook and Reddit? About two hours."
Next Joke
"""Rogue One"" idea: The spies anxiously wait to meet their new commander. Boldly - regally - he strides into the room. ""Mesa Jar-Jar Binks"""
"My sex life is a lot like the Olympic 100m final. I wait 4 years for it and it's over in less than 10 seconds."
"What do you call a Jihadist that loves turkey? A Tryptophanatic."
"Shout out to people who rate & review things cuz I don't like to rate or review things but I like to know how things are rated & reviewed"
"[me narrating a documentary on urchins] ""look at these boring moist porcupines"""
"Beware of alphabet grenades... Beware of alphabet grenades, if you throw them it could spell disaster..."
"Sperm whales were created when Chuck Norris masterbated in the ocean."
"Our parenting style can best be described as: Bad cop, Bozo cop"
"The teacher asked... - ""Why did you bring your cat today Jimmy?"" - He replied, crying, ""Because I heard my daddy tell mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy once Jimmy leaves for school!'"""