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Joke of the Day

"People without profile photos, put your photo up 'cause there's no way you're as fat as we're all imagining."

"What do you call a laptop that ejaculates metal? Computer"

"If a threesome is having sex with three people, and a twosome is having sex with two people... I'm handsome."

"Heard rumors that a coworker slept her way to a promotion. Damn, if the bosses only saw how much I sleep at my desk I'd own this place."

"A cow went to war... But he didn't know what was at steak."

"What was the most successful love story in Game of Thrones? Shireen. She was only on Tinder for a couple of minutes."

"Did you hear about the new viking movie staring the guy who played Han Solo? It's called Harrison's Fjord"

"Why did the doctor kick his patients? He was trying to heel them."

"Do you have a turn down? Turn down for what?"

"If Seal was my friend, I would never miss an opportunity to ask him, ""Wanna go clubbing?"""