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Joke of the Day

"Q: What did the head trauma patients do when the price of medicine went up? A: They went on stroke."

"No matter which kids book I read to my screaming baby on an airplane, the moral of the story is always something about a vasectomy."

"Do you even Choo Choo? Because you are a ""Damn Girl"" Karma train"

"Two hats on a hat hanger, one says to the other.... You go on ahead."

"Superpoer Friend: If you could only own one super power what would it be? Me: USSR"

"I saw a really funny joke on /r/Jokes a while back Quite a while back actually."

"According to the New England Journal of Medicine, the blood alcohol level is to be measured in Lohans now"

"One zebra says to the other, ""I'm going to check out that patch of nice green grass over there . . . . . . I'll be white black."""

"Why are drums a fire hazard? Because they're flam-able. Ba-da Bum tsss."

"Me: I won't be in due to a VOLCANO Boss: ..we live, in Florida..? Me: IRRELEVANT Boss: Me: *opens 3rd bottle of vodka, puts on arm floaties*"