59184

Joke of the Day

"How do you get down off a horse? You don't, you get down off a duck."

"My wife sure is picky for someone who married me."

"It would have been cool to see the discovery of salt. ""This food tastes bland. Let's see if I can improve it by adding some rocks."""

"Me: Whatcha doing on the PC? Daughter: Looking at peckers. M: WHAT?!? D: Science project on chickens. M: Oh. D: You walked RIGHT into that."

"I have the perfect response to a text but its too mean Girl: What is your dumbest pet-peeve me: People asking stupid questions"

"Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminating hunger. What do men dream of? Being stuck in an elevator with the Doublemint twins."

"[music club] what should we play today [hand goes up] yes joe? ""banjo"" all those who wanna ban joe raise their hand [everyones hand goes up]"

"If evolution is real how come? Monkeys still throw their poop underhanded"

"Nice guys finish last. And with me, women don't finish at all."

"Anybody taking bath in Milk.. ""Why do you take baths in milk?"" ""I can't find a cow tall enough for a shower."""