59030
Joke of the Day
"We get it, painters: you love naked women and bowls of fruit."
Next Joke
"""Hey, let's share a bottle of wine and try out the shriek-laugh we've been rehearsing."" -The women next to everyone everywhere."
"If u drink the blue liquid from a Magic 8-Ball u can see the future trust me my friend Keith did once & said he was gonna die & then he did"
"I tried uploading my sex tape to PornHub. They told me to try Vine."
"Progeria jokes get old real quick."
"One alternative to having kids is to hire two people to sit in your car and start a loud argument every time your favorite song comes on."
"Tell me your best ""When is a --- not a ---?"" joke I'll start you off: When is a door not a door? > When it's ajar! When are eyes not eyes? > When the wind makes them water!"
"Me: Yes, I'd like the Mexican massage. Masseuse: The what? Me: *hands him taco seasoning and sour cream* Masseuse: Me: Let's go, chop chop."
"What do you call a sick eagle? Illegal"
"Any ideas for how I can repair some torn duct tape?"