59007

Joke of the Day

"I had an awkward moment with my english teacher. Apparently pathetic fallacy has nothing to do with erectile dysfunction."

"I just had sex with a woman who was 101 years old. In binary."

"What I learned from small crosses placed along the roadside with flowers. Christians are horrible drivers."

"*rage dresses *rage stomps down stairs *rage closes neighbors banging garbage can lid flapping in wind *rage stomps upstairs *rage undresses"

"You can catch a decent buzz from smoking catnip but don't be surprised if you wake up on top of the fridge."

"whats the difference between a baby and an onion? i cry when i chop an onion"

"""Dad I'm gay..."" ""Hi gay, I'm dad"""

"TIFU by disappointing a girl with my 3.2 incher. She didn't take American Express."

"Which Pokemon got a cold? Pik-a-choo."

"After DST I stopped to visit my dyslexic friend... http://www.funnyordie.com/articles/12d1747cd7/the-agony-of-dyslexia"