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Joke of the Day

"My mother never attempted to wean me off of breast feeding. Just cut me off entirely one day... ...as if that first year of college wasn't difficult enough."

"Hitler wasn't all that bad, He killed Hitler."

"I'm gods gift to women if god only shopped at Rite Aid."

"What do you call a 200 year old Buffalo? A bison-tennial."

"Just thought of way to discourage teenage smoking. Instead of saying ""Cancer"" on boxes replace it with the word ""Acne""."

"The first rule of thesaurus club is... You do not talk, speak, communicate, orate, or converse about thesaurus club"

"How do you make holy water? You boil the hell outta it."

"What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler?? Michael Phelps managed to finish a race."

"What kind of overalls does Mario wear? Denim, denim, denim. edit: (works best if said out loud)"

"I'm sick and tired of hearing Jew jokes! Anne Frankly, none of them are even that good."