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Joke of the Day

"I always carry a lighter in case I end up at an impromptu concert...or need to set someone's house on fire. Either way, I'm prepared."

Next Joke
 
"Ten years ago I gave up alcohol and women... it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. -George Best"
"A man walks into a bar... OUCH!!!!"
"I don't always think I'm right....but whenever I think I'm wrong I tend to be mistaken."
"Tolkien once wrote a novel set in an office... It's titled, ""And My Fax""."
"Why are prostitutes cheaper compared to girlfriends and wives to many rich people? Because they dont have to pay attention"
"Today I had a mild panic attack over the fact I will die someday. Then I bought some shit on Amazon. Your mom is a hermaphrodite."
"Learn from your parents mistakes... Use birth control"
"If it comes down to Joe Biden vs Donald Trump we should just accept our fates & let a chili dog eating contest determine who's president."
"Finders, Keepers I saw this cool mine selling shop in Iraq."