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Joke of the Day

"You wanna know why me and my wife don't see eye to eye anymore after 26 years of marriage? She lost her legs so we're no longer the same height. edit: I'm sorry, I thought this was /r/antijokes"

Next Joke
 
"Knock knock joke Knock knock Whos there Broken Pencil Broken Pencil who Never mind...its pointless!"
"What do you get if you cross a worm and an elephant ? Very big worm holes in your garden !"
"How do you plug a plow into a car stereo? Through the ox input."
"Mom, can you take us to the maul? -teen bears, probably"
"A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide"
"Confucious he say... Man who fart in church, sit in his own pew..."
"Two wind turbines in a field and one says to the other ""Do you like music?"" He replies ""I'm a big metal fan."""
"Please continue to tell me how the life you created for yourself is so miserable instead of taking actual steps to change it."
"How many republicans does it take to fix a problem? No one knows. It's never happened."