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Joke of the Day

"Third party US presidential candidate Gary Johnson just delivered a crushing blow to the Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton campaigns By keeping his mouth shut."

"Jennifer Aniston's dance scenes as a stripper in ""We're The Miller's"" are totally Oscar worthy. Oscar is my nickname for my penis."

"Nope. Not gonna follow anyone whose name is upside down. I got enough problems."

"Uncle Bill always gave 100% Son: How did he die Dad? Dad: He donated blood."

"Would an unfulfilled beer ad bikini model... be known as a sadder Budweiser girl?"

"How do scaredy-cats answer the phone? Yellow?"

"A dark sense of humor is like a Make-A-Wish child, never gets old."

"Employees are rungs on the ladder to success... don't be afraid to step on a few."

"""Just saw this text."" Just saw this lie."

"I would have won the Junior Olympics too... ..if it weren't for you medalling kids."