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Joke of the Day

"Why does Vincent van Gogh always look forward to thenew year? Because everyone wishes him a new ear."

"Autocorrect? More like Autocorrect! Am I right? Sorry, Autocorrect ruined my joke."

"Why Nissan Sunny? Is there Nissan Rainy?"

"""I love u"" ""Umm isn't it a bit too soon to say I love you?"" ""Oh ha I meant the letter U. What's your fav u word? Mine is Unreciprocated lol"""

"To whom was Shia LaBeouf chanting ""*He will not divide us*"" after he got arrested yesterday? His buttcheeks."

"Why don't blind people skydive? It scares the shit out of the seeing eye dog."

"Two antennas fell in love.. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent."

"What do you call a midget physic that has escaped from prison?? A small medium at large"

"Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: There have been sightings of UFOs."

"I told my wife I want to try anal sex... She said she's been having anal sex for years. My entire life is the joke."