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Joke of the Day
"[First day of dropping kids off at school] *Hugs and crying* [2nd day] ""Get out!"""
Next Joke
"if theres liquid water on mars i dont care about it. im not going to drink it"
"Yo mama so fat Her shirt size has more x's than a 12 Year olds gamertag"
"sir do u know why I pulled u over? ""actually yes officer I do, im a psychic. but DO YOU know why you'll beat me with your club in 1 minute"""
"What do you get if you cross a soldier and a scientist? A marine biologist."
"If Panic! At the disco were Mexican... They would be called Hispanics at the disco"
"They're making a movie about a Kamikaze pilot who wants to assassinate a Catholic Priest It's called ""Aryan vs Predator"""
"Knock Knock Somebody knocks on door: - Who is there? - Police? - What do you want? - We want to talk. - How many of you are there? - Two. - So talk with each other."
"You are free to criticize athletes. They are free to criticize you too of course, but they don't, because your job is dull and no one cares."
"Why are Saudis so behind on current events? Because they live under Iraq."