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Joke of the Day

"What should you do if a monster runs through your front door? Run through the back door."

"I have 7,777 followers. Shouldn't coins be coming out of my computer or something? #gyp"

"No more gay jokes. Cum on guys."

"If you love someone just tell them. Or get drunk and text them 75 times, that's practically the same thing."

"I asked my friend what he does for a living. He said, ""I cut the arse off a cow and cook it."" At least he's making ends meet."

"Has anyone tried watering old people? Maybe they just need to be watered."

"Everything in earthquake-prone areas should be built on top of a giant Tempurpedic mattress."

"Hello everyone, this is your captain speaking. The plane's going down. Look, stop screaming, that's not going to make me a better pilot"

"""Luke, I have no idea who your father is."" #AlternateUniverseFilms"

"They say it's the journey that matters and not the destination, which is good because I've no clue where I'm going."