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Joke of the Day

"Racial jokes: Put em here, let's see what ya got! How do you starve a black man? You put his food-stamps in his work boots!"

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"What is green and if you press a button its red? A frog in a mixer."
"Why don't Jewish mothers drink? Alcohol interferes with their suffering."
"He told her that trees blossom in her presence. What he meant was that she scares the sap back up into them."
"Relationship advice on /r/relationships User: So my boyfriend and I... /r/relationships: Break up with him."
"Dropped my wallet today & a homeless guy chased me down to give it back. I was so moved I took out all of my money & gave him a free wallet."
"[mall food court] Me: *stomach rumbling* OMG not now Brain: Too bad you hate using public washrooms My White Undies: Sweet baby jesus no"
"Did you hear about the Wall Street bankers that won the Nobel Peace Prize in Chemistry? They turned the economy into shit."
"How do you know you're kissing a french horn player? They try to stick their hand up your butt."
"Boyfriend questionnaire: 1) Have job? 2) Have car? 3) Have goals? If you answer yes to any of the above questions thanks but no thanks."