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Joke of the Day

"A zombie jumped out at me, in a haunted house, but he didn't scare me. He did, however, catch my elbow in his face."

Next Joke
 
"Just tore seven ligaments trying to avoid being handed the phone by my wife."
"What's worse than a moron? A lessoff."
"My kid's favorite joke right now: Knock knock. Who's there? I eat mop. ... omg that is SO gross"
"Have you heard the latest by Lady Marmalade and the Pectin Pack? Oh wait, I forgot you don't like jam bands"
"Why wasn't Jesus born in Ireland? They couldn't find 3 wise men and a virgin."
"How do you keep a blonde busy? Write ""Please turn over"" on both sides of a page and hand it to her."
"A toilet was stolen from a police station today... It's a pretty serious crime. The police have nothing to go on."
"What do you call Irish fruit punch? A barfight in a gaybar"
"""My mind is telling me nooo... But my body... My body's telling me yesss...BABY"" Cashier: Sir...would you like fries with that or not?"