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Joke of the Day

"Oh you got ""Swag""? Don't forget to put that on your Burger King Application."

"What do you call gay sound waves? Faghertz"

"What did Tennessee? ...the same thing Arkansas"

"I went to a prostitute and asked her if I could do her Greek style. ""Sure"" she said So I fucked her in the ass and left without paying."

"Why do you become a smurf every time you are sad? Because you're feeling blue."

"Damn girl, are you misplaced silverware? Because why aren't you in the kitchen?"

"I am giving up a few negative people for lent. So, if you call, text, Facebook or email and I don't get to back to you?? Odds are it was you."

"What's the difference between a canoe and a jew? Canoes tip"

"I tested positive for optimism."

"How much does Jesus love you? Thiiiiiiis much. (Must be said while arms are raised out to side)"