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Joke of the Day

"What do you call gay sound waves? Faghertz"

"I just got fired from my noose making job :( I was there for several months, but I just couldn't get the hang of it."

"I was hoping to be friends with benefits.. because my health insurance sucks!"

"A mexican magician told the audience he'll disappear on the count of three. He said ""Uno, dos"" *POOF* He disappeared without a tres."

"Q: What do you call a snake that makes a lot of noise when it eats? A: A slurpent."

"When I think of all the money I've spent on booze in my life, I wish I had it all back. Imagine all the booze I could buy!"

"*slides a cheese slice with my number written on it in your pocket*"

"It's not easy to make small talk with a meteorologist."

"How would the Mexican Star-Spangled Banner begin? Jose can you see"

"The Feds say that marijuana has no accepted medical use, overlooking how it could help 20 million unemployed Americans not give a shit."