56298

Joke of the Day

"i want to create and sell action figures based around fathers. ""father figures"". First edition, ""dead beat dad"". BTW it's just an empty box."

"ACCOUNTANT: *taking a look at my books* These are just winky-face emojis. ME: Yep. ACCOUNTANT: I think I know why your business is failing."

"Im surprised Mayweather can hug so well... despite all those domestic abuse charges"

"On one hand, I want to stop masturbating but on the other hand, I have my penis..."

"What do you call a ghost in the Outback? An Apparigine!"

"I go through the 7 stages of grief just to get to work everyday."

"What's the difference between jam and jelly? You can't jelly a dick in your mouth."

"What does a gay horse eat? hAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAyyyy! . . . . . . What does a gay pirate eat? . . . . . **GAY PIRATE FOOD, ARR!!!**"

"Don't trust anyone that orders a Medium Pizza...."

"What's the fastest branch of the military? The Marines. When they retire, they're corvettes."