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Joke of the Day

"If you can down 20 vodka shots in 15 seconds... ...You must be Russian."

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"Every 9 minutes, someone is infected with the herpes virus. I bet that someone lives in Jersey."
"Why did the college student change his major from Biology to Physics after his first exam? He needed to see if how fast his grade dropped broke any laws of physics."
"If athletes get Athlete's Foot, what do astronauts get? Missle Toe."
"Little kid making faces at you from his bus window? Follow him home and make faces through his window at night."
"The list of things I hate the most is -Hate -Lists -Irony -Cheap jokes stolen from the internet -Irony -Repetition -Did I mention irony?"
"Eminem needs to release an aftershave and shower gel gift set for Christmas Eminessence and Marshal Lathers."
"Do you want to hear a joke about suicide? So there was this girl."
"The annoying moment when I get comfy in bed and realize I forgot to do something."
"What's a blind mans favorite car? A cataract"