55884
Joke of the Day
"Why do you never see a crackhead over 30? Cause they're fucking dead"
Next Joke
"My wife's cooking is incredible. With a silent 'cr'."
"Me: ""Gee Thanks for spilling Cheerios all over the floor."" 3yo: ""You're welcome Mom, look at this!""*scatters more on floor I deserve that."
"UGH. When I text girls that I have standards, I really need to stop abbreviating the word standards to STDs."
"How did Moses make his tea? Hebrewed it"
"Did Abraham's brother have any kids? Yes. A Lot."
"What does a baby have in common with a old car? They're fun to take apart, but they're a real bitch to put back together."
"Life is like art done in chalk, beautiful but temporary, enjoy it while possible."
"What's the difference between statutory rape and sex with a minor? Gender"
"I had an addiction to soap... but thanks to some dirty bastards stealing all of it, I am clean now."