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Joke of the Day
"Where do you find a dog with no arms and no legs? Right where you left him."
Next Joke
"You're mom is so poor... that if someone gave her the finger. She'd say thank you."
"What did one eye say to the other? Between you and me, something smells"
"FYI: hey my wife came home in a terrible mood and I figured I'd read her one of my tweets to cheer her up, turns out that's a bad idea guys"
"Remember, children. The best way to get a puppy for Christmas is to beg for a baby brother."
"Guys! I finally dusted my bedroom! And guess what? I HAVE A NIGHTSTAND!!!"
"I bet all this shit started because someone told Trump he couldn't be president and Trump said ""hold my beer, watch this"""
"What is Hitler's favorite type of car? A fuhrari"
"I admit opening an alligator petting zoo was not the best idea, but I told the kids to be careful so there's plenty of blame to go around."
"Revenge is never as satisfying as you'd hope And the cops always come sooner then you expect"