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Joke of the Day

"I often find myself rewording a long tweet so many times that it completely loses the original subject. This one started off about a cat."

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"What were Charles Darwin's favorite fruits? Oranges and peaches."
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"Niantic's customer support minor text fixes Edit: The title **is** the joke."
"What is the loneliest number? My phone number, call me please! #Please don't"
"What's the most popular sport in Mexico? Cross-country."
"What is as big as King Kong but doesn't weigh anything? King Kong's shadow."
"I believe in ten years, gifts for newly born baby would be a SIM card and a cell phone."
"This Just In For News A man apparently, we assume, was black, and we assume, was shot, and we assume, by a police officer. More details, we assume, later."
"Officially committed to Princeton University class of 2019 majoring in women's studies with a concentration in culinary arts"