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Joke of the Day

"I've bought tickets to all One Directions upcoming gigs.They're not my cup of tea but the tickets say The Doors open at 7:15 and i love them"

"What's the difference between jam and jelly? [NSFW] I can't jelly my dick into your mom's ass."

"10 reasons why doctors use defibrillators... Number 4 will shock you!"

"What's invisible and smells like bananas? ....Monkey farts"

"Freedom Isn't Free, So Stop Whining And Pay Your Taxes."

"heres a bad joke your life"

"What's the difference between chemistry and cooking? In chemistry, you should never lick the spoon."

"A subscription to *Time* is not the most difficult concept to get your head around. I've told you: *Time* and *Time* again."

"*checking out of Hotel California* You can check-out any time you like ""Okay yes, now"" But you can never leave! ""Ugh where's your manager"""

"Happy and Sad An old man says to his wife, ""Honey, there is no possible way to feel both happiness and sadness at the same time."" The wife says, ""Out of all your brothers, you have the biggest dick."""